Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors SSRIs are a type of antidepressant. Some people who take this type of drug may experience emotional blunting, or a switched-off emotional center. Doctors can help you find another alternative if the drug affects you in this way. Emotional detachment could also be the result of trauma or abuse. People who have been neglected or abused may develop this as a coping mechanism.
They may also talk with you, a family member, or a significant other about your behaviors. Understanding how you feel and act can help a provider recognize a pattern that could suggest this emotional issue. If your healthcare provider believes you struggle with emotional attachment and openness because of another condition, they may suggest treating that first.
These conditions might include depression, PTSD, or borderline personality disorder. Medicine and therapy are helpful for these conditions. If the emotional issues are a result of trauma, your doctor may recommend psychotherapy or talk therapy. This treatment can help you learn to overcome the impacts of the abuse. You also learn new ways to process experiences and anxieties that previously upset you and led to the emotional numbing. In that case, you may not need to seek any type of treatment.
A therapist or other mental health provider will be a good resource. For some people, emotional detachment is a way of coping with overwhelming people or activities. In that sense, it can be healthy. You choose when to be involved and when to step away. When you experience episodes of detachment this is known as 'dissociation' - leading to a gradual withdrawal from your life, as you become socially isolated and unable to form loving relationships.
If this happens over a long period of time, the things you once loved may feel very hollow, your relationships become meaningless and your work is no longer fulfilling anymore. Dissociation is not something you choose to do consciously. It is often an unconscious response to trauma or distressing events that you have internalised.
A kind of body memory that has become frozen because you shut down and were unable to process your emotions at the time. For example, somewhere in your past you may have been too vulnerable to cope with a distressing experience - such as long periods of neglect and loneliness as a child, physical or sexual abuse, an unexpected bereavement or witnessing horrific events in your life.
This may be an issue with regard to post-traumatic stress disorder PTSD. It can also happen if, as a child, your parents were highly anxious, aggressive or discharged their distress in the family home.
Under these stressful conditions, you do not choose to shut down your emotions, your brain is often too overwhelmed to cope and protects itself by suppressing the pain and powerlessness of not being able to adapt. As a result of this disconnection, you may suffer from feelings of emptiness inside or a sense of dread that you cannot shake off.
Slowly, you lose your passion for life, or any personal interest in things that once stirred you with joy and excitement. Unable to understand what is happening to you in this frozen state, you may learn to internalise your frustrations and anger, while experiencing dread without knowing why.
Your anxiety and anger get so locked in, you avoid challenging situations or confrontation with others. Then, you only express it in occasional outbursts of rage or withdrawal when it becomes unbearable. Friends and family may find it almost impossible to talk with you, or as you become more detached, they may find it difficult to empathise and connect with you. While loved ones may accuse you of being cold and aloof. Shutting down emotions can be a normal part of human experience, as a coping strategy in stressful situations.
Under high stress, it allows your body and brain to protect itself from perceived threats or harm. We can also become emotionally detached after a painful bereavement, an episode of anxiety, or a prolonged period of depression. For mothers with postnatal depression, you may feel cut off from maternal instincts towards your child.
This leads to a profound sense of guilt and shame about not being a good enough parent. Dissociation can overwhelm your ability to make everyday decisions, especially if you have a 'freeze' response to anxiety. Download Article Explore this Article parts. Tips and Warnings. Related Articles. Article Summary. Part 1. Recognize that numbing yourself comes at a cost.
Studies show that repressing negative emotions can deplete your psychological resources, making it more difficult for you to handle stress and make good decisions. This means that numbing yourself from emotional pain might hurt your resilience or even your ability to remember events. Only numb yourself if it is truly necessary for you to get through your daily life.
An effective alternative to numbing yourself is to work through your emotional pain by reframing it and focusing on more positive emotions. For example, you might want to numb yourself to an embarrassing incident that happened to you at work. However, maybe you can try to see that the incident is not humiliating, but rather quite funny. This is commonly known as cognitive reappraisal and, while not the same as emotional numbness, can produce a similar desired effect.
Go to source or clinical depression. Avoid people, settings, and events you dislike. The easiest way for you to numb your emotional response is to control your surroundings. Make sure that you are not triggering extreme emotional responses in the first place. Take control over situations you dislike. Sometimes you have to be around people you dislike or perform tasks you hate. If you cannot avoid the things that cause you emotional pain, find ways to take control over them.
Do not view yourself as a helpless victim: find as much agency as you can in the situation. Simply reminding yourself that you always have a choice can help you get through emotional times relatively unscathed. Then you can relax the night before the exam. If you hate going to parties because there are too many people, ask one or two close friends to attend it with you. Seek them out if you need to get away from the crowd and have a more private conversation.
Distract yourself. When you feel your emotions getting in your way, stop what you are doing immediately and do something else instead. Try to do an activity that will require you to focus all of your mental and emotional attention on it. By distracting yourself, you will be able to process your emotions later, when you are more likely to be calm and reasonable. But for now, don't worry about processing your emotional state: simply change your mood by changing your activity.
Some good activities include: Playing a video game Watching a movie Engaging in your favorite hobby Going to a concert or comedy show Exercising Counting down from in increments of 7 Focusing on finding a color, such as blue, in your surroundings Noticing how your feet feel on the ground.
Give yourself technology breaks. Technology can lead to more intense emotions: by remaining plugged in, you are exposing yourself to added work stress, life stress, and feelings of helplessness. You can make yourself calmer and happier instantly by quitting social media sites. Act neutral, even if you do not feel that way. According to the Facial Feedback Hypothesis, you can change your emotional state simply by changing your facial expression.
In other words: by pretending to feel a certain way, you can actually begin feeling that way for real. If you want to be emotionally numb, act emotionally numb. This might be difficult during times of stress, but with some practice it will soon become natural. Stay neutral by: Maintaining a cool, deadpan expression Keeping your lips neutral, in neither a smile nor a frown Speaking in low tones at a low volume Remaining terse by keeping your sentences brief and to the point Maintaining eye contact with a calm, blank stare.
Part 2. Tell yourself that negative emotions are all in your brain. Tell yourself that negative emotions are not objective facts: you are never forced to feel emotional pain. Remember that emotional pain comes from your own mind. When a negative emotion threatens to emerge, simply dismiss it with the mantra: "This is only in my mind. Rehearse situations that might cause you emotional pain in the future.
In addition to armoring yourself against emotional pain you feel in the present, you can also use mindfulness techniques to prepare yourself for future emotional pain. Think about events in the near future that might cause you distress, such as a stressful exam, a potential fight with your girlfriend, or a difficult task at work.
Imagine a calm, unemotional response to each of these future events, and practice overcoming these negative emotions. Soon you will inure yourself to these strong emotions, and you will be better equipped to handle yourself calmly. Pay attention to your emotional state. Every day, perform a few periodic "mental check-ins" to determine your emotional well-being at that specific time. Even when you are not sad or upset, being mindful of what you are feeling and why will help you understand your instinctive emotional responses to everyday life.
When you perform your "mental check-in," ask yourself the following questions: What am I feeling in this moment? Am I feeling a single, overwhelming emotion, or a combination of emotions? Simply giving your emotions a label can help you view them more objectively.
Are my emotions due to internal factors such as my own fears or external factors such as when somebody yells at me? Do I like the way I am feeling now? Perhaps you are feeling joyful or grateful about life and want to foster these emotions.
But perhaps you are feeling anxious or nervous and do not want to experience these emotions in the future.
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